The Stanford Inn by the Sea - Eco-Lodge & Retreat Centertag:www.stanfordinn.com,2010:/blog//12010-03-10T05:33:22ZLiving in Mendocino - Lifestyle and Issues. Movable Type Personal 4.12Gypsy - 1996 - 2010 tag:www.stanfordinn.com,2010:/blog//1.1012010-03-10T05:27:19Z2010-03-10T05:33:22Z February 6th, Saturday night, on my way to bed, I passed Murphy, our lab-cross, in the hallway. I climbed the first flight of stairs to our bedroom and in the near darkness, a dog flew passed me. Rounding the...
February 6th, Saturday night, on my way to bed, I passed Murphy, our lab-cross, in the hallway. I climbed the first flight of stairs to our bedroom and in the near darkness, a dog flew passed me. Rounding the winding staircase, I looked up and watched as a white tail wagged in front of the bedroom door. I was totally confused. Murphy doesn't have a white tail. I looked down the stairs and looked back-up - no tail, no dog.
I called Murphy; heard her coming behind me. I stopped, stunned.
The first dog up the stairs? Gypsy!
He had died the night before. Months ago, when he was able-bodied, he would run ahead and wait at the door to go to bed. He hadn't been up-stairs since early October.
That first February week began auspiciously. For the first time in several months, Gypsy was nearly able to get up on his own. He begged for treats and played with his toys. That was Monday. But quickly he grew weak and by Friday, he was failing and after four months of near immobility due to arthritis his heart gave-up. He died as I was petting him.
I didn't know how to announce his passing. He is already missed by our friends and staff and by guests returning to the inn.
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The Canadian Advantage - Why Canadians are Smilingtag:www.stanfordinn.com,2010:/blog//1.1002010-02-27T05:43:09Z2010-02-27T05:47:05ZDuring its reportage of the Vancouver Winter Olympics, NBC is covering all thing Canadian and are correctly portraying Canadians as generally polite, reserved, dedicated, hard working and happy. At the Inn some of our fellow workers were talking about how...
During its reportage of the Vancouver Winter Olympics, NBC is covering all thing Canadian and are correctly portraying Canadians as generally polite, reserved, dedicated, hard working and happy. At the Inn some of our fellow workers were talking about how much more friendly Canadians seem to be.
Canadians are not friendlier than Americans. Nor are they more generous. Traveling and living in both countries, my experience is that Americans and Canadians are equally generous, helpful, polite and outgoing. But there is a profound difference.
Canadians are more "comfortable" - I don't know how else to put this.
Thinking about it, their comfort comes from the knowledge that if they become ill, they will not lose their homes because of high medical costs and potential bankruptcy. In Manitoba, where Joan was born and where we both attended graduate school, their version of "universal health care" is paid for from general Provincial revenues. As a Canadian and Manitoban resident I was issued Manitoba Health Services card on January 1, 1974.
Today I am insured with our employees under an Anthem policy with a huge deductible. It is what we can afford. Medical insurance issues occupy considerable staff time just in management alone. And it is very expensive. Twenty-seven years ago, we could afford to insure all of our staff, part and full time, paying 100% of the employee's costs for a low deductible policy. Today, we cannot. We now pay only 50% and only for full time employees. We wish we could pay more and for a lower deductible policy. But to do so requires raising rates, which at this time and in this economy is problematic.
Manitoba's medical care simply eases life. And don't be fooled with regard to claims that Canadians do not get the medical care they need. We have never heard anything like this. Quite the contrary - we have only heard plaudits: People with cancer, heart disease, rheumatoid arthritis - all feel that they received essential, life saving care. If they need a specialist, even in another province, their "insurance" provides for travel and the necessary treatments.
Canadians do have this on us. Americans simply do not have a clue regarding how much easier life is without having to worry about their medical care.
Happy New Year - and an update on Vada.tag:www.stanfordinn.com,2010:/blog//1.992010-01-12T06:41:05Z2010-01-12T06:45:11ZOn November 19th I wrote about the shooting of Vada Vasquez in the South Bronx. For those who read this entry, please note that our daughter reports that she made a great recovery and was home for the holidays. I...
On November 19th I wrote about the shooting of Vada Vasquez in the South Bronx. For those who read this entry, please note that our daughter reports that she made a great recovery and was home for the holidays.
I apologize for not writing for the past couple of months and especially for not letting readers know that Vada was able to go home.
We have been taking care of Gypsy. His arthritis flared up and he fell hurting himself in middle of November and we have not been able to get him to the Inn and we are spending much more time at home, helping him up and walk outside. He's vegan - we know that helps. But he does not tolerate NSAIDs, including aspirin, ibuprofen, Rimadyl. Today we are adding turmeric to his repertoire of seaweed, Traumheel, peony and licorice, cetyl myristoleate, etc.
We'll keep you informed - please wish him well. And we wish you a wonderful New Year!
Violence - and diet.....tag:www.stanfordinn.com,2009:/blog//1.982009-11-20T05:52:36Z2009-11-20T06:42:01ZYesterday, November 17th, a friend as well as a former employee called from across the continent. We talked for quite a while. During the conversation, he mentioned that he believed that I hadn't been happy with him when he last...
Yesterday, November 17th, a friend as well as a former employee called from across the continent. We talked for quite a while. During the conversation, he mentioned that he believed that I hadn't been happy with him when he last lived and worked here because he wasn't vegan. He told me that it takes some time to "digest" the information regarding the health effects of a vegan diet vis-à-vis the animal based American diet. He said that I had time to understand all of this but he hadn't had enough time.
He was wrong. First, I wasn't disappointed that he had not become vegan. I knew that he didn't understand. Second I hadn't become vegan for physical health at all.
I told him that it was a simple change: Twenty-four years ago, I injured myself and couldn't work for a couple of weeks and something - maybe a show on TV or a book - caused me to realize I could not kill an animal for food, yet I ate meat. "Aha," I suddenly knew that I was a hypocrite: Essentially I "asked" others to kill for me. This realization meant I was vegetarian and done with meat. I told him, that I grabbed this opportunity to reduce my hypocritical burden.
While we talked a 15 year old Bronx Latin student was shot in the back of the head down the street from the school. Our daughter, Kate, called to tell us, crying. The girl who was shot, Vada Vasquez was Kate's student when Kate was with Teach for America. A vibrant, talented musician and student, Vada is presently in an induced coma and not breathing on her own.
Vada Vasquez was shot by a 16 year-old boy when he fired a salvo of bullets at a 19 year old. Up to that time he had a "clean" record. His cohorts did not.
Of course, we didn't know this when we talked. But Vada's shooting reminded me how much we need to reduce violence in our lives - from the violence on the streets erupting from poverty to the violence which brings food to our table. We need to do this with love - as nurturers, helping to nurture one another, the animals who are in this world with us and the very planet itself.
I am unable to finish this post on an upbeat note. For too long we have tolerated violence. Perhaps our unwillingness to confront violence and the problems which underlie it comes from our failure to acknowledge the violence that feeds us - our treatment of all but a few dogs, cats and horses. Where is our outrage?! We have become inured to it and that is wrong.
Our Passion: Creating an Evocative Destinationtag:www.stanfordinn.com,2009:/blog//1.972009-10-04T21:25:05Z2009-10-05T01:22:52ZJoan and I have been innkeeping for 34 years. The average length of time in this business for "owner-innkeepers" used to be 7 years and we are certain that we have raised that average. We remain innkeepers because we are...
educere in Latin - "to lead out" or to "evoke." We are evokers - at least Joan is - I might be more a provoker.
The inn is our "campus" and every guest room, common rooms, the gardens, and the river are classrooms. Text books are our newsletter and the books that we offer for sale or inspiration (usually inspiring guests to order from Barnes and Noble, Borders, Amazon or, better, their local bookstore).
We would have left innkeeping years ago if it were not for our passion to show that it is easy, practical and delightful - even revelatory - to live sustainably. However we did not get into the sustainable movement: It found us. We pursued "sustainable" practices before anyone applied the word to what we do. We only wanted to live harmoniously and to create a life based on the premise "Do no harm" or practically, "Do the least harm." We started organic gardening because it is productive, healthy and less harmful than conventional. We recycled because we hate waste. We composted all organic matter - garden and food wastes. We separated California Redemption bottles from other glass and plastic bottles; we divided paper into newspaper, cardboard, and office paper. At first we hauled all of this to a recycling center and when Waste Management offered to pick up recycling, we said, "Sure!" After a while, we noticed that the driver was emptying the containers into a single bin on his truck. We asked why, "We've gone to single stream recycling." Apparently Waste Management caved to Northern California's laziness; too many people were unwilling to separate their waste. Now we single-stream and believe that we need to ask more of our neighbors so that we can return to multi-stream recycling. We store our old electronic gear - computers, cell phones, printers, monitors, etc., because we can't be assured that this equipment won't end-up poisoning children in India or China.
In other words, we think about what we do and we ask that our staff thinks about what they do for us. We anticipate that our inn guests, diners, paddlers, and bicyclers might pick up on the attention we give to the details of living in and operating a rural resort set in a garden. We don't know if we are particularly successful but we have touched a few guests, some of our staff and some members of our small community. We could do this no other way.
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Remembering BS Sessionstag:www.stanfordinn.com,2009:/blog//1.962009-09-26T22:24:25Z2009-09-27T02:41:04ZNot long ago I found a paper I wrote with a friend while we were at the University of Manitoba. I was taking every undergraduate class in anthropology in order that I could enter graduate school the following term. I...
Sharing the common ecstasy must go further than sharing emotional time with fellow men, for ecstasy requires the deep appreciation of man and his relation to the planet upon which he lives. This is awareness of a fuller extent: Once man is able to share, once each individual is fully able to relate to another human being, it will become absolutely apparent that man is also in a symbiotic relationship with his environment - that man is and can only be a part of all he is able to perceive. Godness is extended to all that is, to all which man is a part. This is absolutely a defiant understanding of man, for through the traditions of Western, North American society, man understands himself as dominant, as being able to take from the earth as he wishes, the more the better. Breed as much as he wishes, the more the better. Consume whatever he wishes, the more the better. The living planet is in agony and its agony is felt by man in terms of starvation, over population, destroyed natural resources, pollution, and the other harsh cruelties which man bestows on this planet, on himself.
I share this because it is so collegiate - wordy, excited, and meaningful. There's a joyousness in the premise that human relationship can be inspirational leading to the experience of a greater relationship to the entire planet. This human expansionism is an essential theme of Thaddeus Golas' The Lazy Man's Guide to Enlightenment (1983).
(Check out this slim volume - it's a great introduction the expansion of consciousness that many sought and still seek with drugs.)
How many students have walked through that door connecting with another? How many have experienced the ecstasy of knowing another - of discovering a friend - a twin, and not just focusing on each other, like staring into a mirror, have expanded into an awareness of the connection of all things. How many have gone deeply into appreciating the essence of experience and realized this joyous connection with the planet? And how many, then, walked back into ordinary life without acting on the knowledge gained from such an intense experience? Well, I am one. I don't know about Nels: I lost contact with him years ago. But the connection to life on the planet re-awoke a few years later and I became vegetarian.
I am now vegan - that is, I eat no animal products at all. Consuming animal products extends the suffering Nels and I wrote about. The planet suffers, too, from improperly growing and handling plants - in particular the "processing" of plant foods. Here, we prefer whole foods. Prepared foods (such as soy protein isolates or cakes like Twinkies) are usually are not whole foods. Lentils, almonds, avocados, sunflower and flax seeds are. Processed foods require substantial energy inputs and the output is never as nutritious.
It took me years to live this part of this philosophy.
So this entry is about remembering! Remember those intense discussions, what we called "BS-ing" or "BS" sessions. Remember the discovery that you were connected to another person - that there was a resonance and a joy in that recognition. (Often this happens with friends, not girl friends or boy friends, because that gets complicated.) Remember that exploration of ideas and feelings and remember those occasions that you were more inclusive - expanded beyond just your fellow explorer and the room - and in touch with the planet, and beyond, to the cosmos.
These remembrances might be life changing!
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Cellphones, Cordless Phones and Cancer - Real Warnings!tag:www.stanfordinn.com,2009:/blog//1.942009-09-05T20:58:24Z2009-09-05T23:39:58ZThis is one of most important entries I have written. I feel badly that I haven't posted this information earlier, but I wanted to do additional research. I have sent emails to people I know with phones which appear to...Cellphones and Brain Tumors 15 Reasons for Concern - Science, Spin and the Truth Behind Interphone.
The authors advocate the adopting the precautionary principle"
The precautionary principle applies where scientific evidence is insufficient, inconclusive or uncertain and preliminary scientific evaluation indicates that there are reasonable grounds for concern that the potentially dangerous effects on the environment, human, animal or plant health may be inconsistent with the high level of protection chosen. (European Commission Communication on the Precautionary Principle - 2nd February 2000: In Cellphones and Brain Tumours....)
Finding that published information regarding microwave radiation to be insufficient, uncertain, manipulated and even biased and that a variety of peer reviewed studies demonstrate correlations between the use of cellphones and cancer, the study recommends taking personal responsibility and lists actions you can take. Below is a modified version of their list:
Use a wired headset, speaker option, or text. (Bluetooth uses microwaves to communicate with the earpiece.)
Keep the cellphone away from your body. Use a holster; keep on the outside of a purse, messenger bag, backpack, etc.
Avoid use in a car, train, bus, or plane. Vehicles are metal and microwaves are reflected by metal ricocheting until they dissipate their energy.
Avoid use in rural areas moving vehicles or wherever there are less than full bars. The greater the distance from antennas, the greater power the cellphone will generate. Distance equals "more power"
Use cellphones as answering machines. Leave off until you can use it to check calls.
Use a corded landline whenever possible to return calls.
Avoid cordless phones. Recent studies indicate that they also increase the risk of cancer.
Avoid use inside buildings, particularly with steel structures
Do not allow children to sleep with the phone - under their pillow or on their bedside table
Do not allow your children under 18 to use cellphones except in an emergency
For those of you who have stuck with me - the following are details from the above study.
Here are the 15 reasons for concern summarized:
Industry's own research showed cellphones caused brain tumors
Subsequent industry-funded research also showed that using a cellphone elevated the risk of brain tumors
Interphone studies, published to date, consistently show use of a cellphone for less than 10 years protects the user from a brain tumor.
Despite the systemic-protective-skewing of all results in Interphone studies, significant risk for brain tumors from cellphone use was still found.
Studies independent of industry funding show what would be expected if wireless phones cause brain tumors.
The danger of brain tumors from cellphone use is highest in children, and the younger a child is when he/she starts using a cellphone, the higher the risk.
There have been numerous governmental warnings about children's use of cellphones.
Exposure limits for cellphones are based only on the danger from heating.
An overwhelming majority of the European Parliament has voted for a set of changes based on "health concerns associated with electromagnetic fields."
Cellphone radiation damages DNA, an undisputed cause of cancer.
Cellphone radiation has been shown to cause the blood-brain barrier to leak.
Cellphone user manuals warn customers to keep the cellphone away from the body even when the cellphone is not in use.
Federal Communications Commission (FCC) warning for cordless phones.
For Digitally Enhanced Cordless Technology, the FCC warns, "This equipment should be installed an operated with a minimum distance of 20 centimeters (almost 8 inches) between the radiator and your body." The radiation from these phones is based on GSM cellphone technology.
Male fertility is damaged by cellphone radiation.
One of the studies cited by the authors is particularly striking in its indictment of not only cellphones but also cordless phones. Pooled analysis of two case-control studies on use of cellular and cordless telephones and the risk for malignant brain tumours diagnosed in 1997-2003 reports odds ratios with a confidence level of .95 of 3.7 for digital cellular phones and 2.3 for ordinary cordless phones for malignant brain tumors when used for more than 2,000 hours. Worse, odds ratios are higher for younger users. (Odds ratio is a measurement between two groups - those who have used the devices versus those who haven't.) To summarize their findings: Cumulative use of cellular and cordless handsets, particularly on one side of one's head, is correlated with increased risk of malignant tumors including gioblastoma.
This study alone is alarming. And it is only one of many cited by the authors of Cellphones and Brain Tumours...
The bad news just keeps coming: A few years ago when I looked-up information concerning the nature of microwaves' effect on the brain - the only effect was understood to be as a point source of heat. This newest report points out that there are unknown effects other than heating: "...why does medicine use these fields for healing bone fractures that did not previously heal with a cast, and the military use them to discourage the enemy?" (Cellphones and Brain Tumours...)
Cellphone manufacturers are providing more substantive warnings than even five years ago. For example, BlackBerry specifies that users carry the phone in an approved holster or keep the phone approximately 25mm or nearly an inch from the body. The company warns that the popular Curve should not even be carried on the body if not in an approved holster that must have a belt clip.
Carrying solutions, including RIM approved carrying solutions and carrying solutions not approved by RIM, that do not come equipped with an integrated belt clip SHOULD NOT be worn or carried on the body. For more information regarding the wearing or carrying of this BlackBerry device without using a RIM approved carrying solution equipped with an integrated belt clip, see the Holster information in the Additional safety guidelines section of this document. http://docs.blackberry.com/en/smartphone_users/deliverables/5451/SIB_8300_series_169506_11.pdf
The iPhone is 10mm better.
For optimal mobile device performance and to be sure that human exposure to RF energy does not exceed the FCC and European Union guidelines, always follow these instructions and precautions: When on a call using the built-in audio receiver in iPhone, hold iPhone with the 30-pin connector pointed down toward your shoulder to increase separation from the antenna. For body-worn operation, keep iPhone at least 15 mm (5/8 inch) away from the body, and only use carrying cases, belt clips, or holders that do not have metal parts and that maintain at least 15 mm (5/8 inch) separation between iPhone and the body. When using the EDGE data transmission feature of iPhone (see the iPhone User's Guide for more information), position iPhone's antenna at least 15 mm (5/8 inch) from the body."http://manuals.info.apple.com/en/iPhone_Product_Info_Guide.pdf
There's more information. But more is not necessary. Just be careful. Use the precautionary principle - be sure to use wired headsets. Don't carry your phone in a pocket and particularly near organs. If you need to use your phone in a vehicle - stop, open the windows. Similarly, use your cellphone outdoors as much as possible or by an open window. A local RF engineer told me when that dual pane glass reflects RF signals, which will cause the phone to power-up. (Interference AND distance = more power!) The cellphone is a wonderful product and a BlackBerry, iPhone and other smart phones are computers usually smaller than a cigarette package - and perhaps far more dangerous. Take care!
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Dining on the Road - Three Thai restaurants to note: Arun's, Chicago; Sokhothai, Winnipeg, MB; & Siam Thai, Billings, MTtag:www.stanfordinn.com,2009:/blog//1.932009-09-03T02:09:47Z2009-09-03T03:14:33ZWe are vegan and are no longer challenged to find decent restaurants on the road with the explosion of Asian restaurants- particularly, Chinese, Thai, and Vietnamese. With the exception of East Indian restaurants, most other ethnic restaurants are animal based....
A note on reviewing: Rarely do we discover restaurants worth reviewing. We are not interested in punishing restaurants, hotels, activities, etc. by writing bad reviews. That's too easy - in fact I used to negatively criticize just because it made me feel better about myself - that I was able to find something wrong with some aspect of some business, event. I felt "smarter" because I could identify someone's error, poor service. Reflecting on this, I found that I was damaging myself - residing in the negative and, really, in "pride." Thus, here are some positive reviews:
Last month, while on vacation, we experienced two "new to us" incredibly fine Thai restaurants - Sukhothai Restaurant in Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada - which ranks as the best standard Thai restaurant we have found and Siam Thai in Billings, Montana, the second best. (The consideration "standard" is required to distinguish most Thai restaurants from the artistic Arun's in Chicago. More on that later.)
At Winnipeg's Sokhothai Restaurant vegetables are perfect - sauces complex, spicy and yet absolutely flavorful. Service is attentive and knowledgeable. We appreciated the menu's pricing - animal based dishes are $1 to $2 additional - partially reflecting the greater resource cost for animal foods. (There's no way to quantify the suffering.) Sokhothai is located at Osborne and Gertrude on the south end of Osborne Village.
Siam Thai in Billings, Montana is in the west end of the city at 3219 Henesta in a small strip mall. Although we only ate lunch, it was remarkable and this restaurant is our second favorite standard Thai restaurant in North America - the first being Sokhothai in Winnipeg. Admittedly we haven't explored Thai Restaurants in Montreal, Toronto, Kansas City, St. Louis, etc. But we have in California's major cities, New York City, and Chicago.
And in Chicago is a Thai restaurant that redefines Thai cuisine and is not at all "standard." In Chicago during the run-up to the presidential elections, Alex introduced us to a remarkable Thai restaurant - Arun's. The dishes here are incredible. Chef Arun Sampanthavivat is an artist. The vegetables and flavors are just right, the sauces amazing - and the plating - outstanding. Arun serves a prix fixe 12 course dinner and a night at Arun's is memorable. Each course - six appetizers, four entrees, and two desserts comprise an exquisite evening. Although Sokhothai and Siam Thai's flavors are outstanding and wholesome, a single dish is a meal where Arun's tasting menu is twelve dishes tailored to each diner. And Arun's is in no way "standard". I know of no other Thai restaurant like Arun's: it is incomparable and for this reason, perhaps, has received a Five Diamond Award from the American Automobile Association.
Vegan Icelandic? When in Manitoba, we stay in Matlock at Joan's cottage. Just up the road is Gimli, Manitoba, the largest Icelandic community outside Iceland. Here we discovered another dining "find" in a former jewelry store, Cronshaws. Joan's oldest friend introduced us - her husband did the extensive woodworking - darkly stained paneling to invoke an intimate British pub. Although in Midwestern Canada, Cronshaws features a menu with dishes created with organic ingredients. The creators of this rural miracle in a fishing village provide a number of vegan items. And they are concerned about health: the bake their "fries" - really potato wedges. They were only able to serve us nine small wedges - because they ran out . Wat we tasted were excellent. They also offer vegan sandwiches, soups, salads and a Turkish appetizer plate with humus and baba ganoush. Cronshaws is truly futuristic.... In the Midwest, in a fishing community populated by Vikings!
In summary - from north to south we recommend Cronshaws Pub in Gimli, Sokhothai in Winnipeg, Siam Thai in Billings, and Arun's in Chicago.
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Home and Canadian Health Caretag:www.stanfordinn.com,2009:/blog//1.922009-08-12T18:57:51Z2009-08-12T19:26:44ZAwoke this morning after a very short night (didn't get to bed until 4:00 AM). A raven called out. There were no other birds announcing their presence. I looked out over the pastures - brown and dry, dust rising up...
Awoke this morning after a very short night (didn't get to bed until 4:00 AM). A raven called out. There were no other birds announcing their presence. I looked out over the pastures - brown and dry, dust rising up from the horses' slow walk to find grass. Mendocino is in the midst of the dry season and our fall-winter-spring visitors, killdeer, robins, redwing black birds, are gone. There are plenty of human visitors escaping inland's heat, exploring the California Coast, and/or just getting away from home, here, now.
Our vacation was wonderful: North America is magnificent - whether the plains relieved only by rivers cutting through the otherwise flat land; grain silos and trees; rolling prairies; mountains; or the coast. We discovered incredible restaurants in unexpected places. For example, a couple of Thai restaurants one in a remodeled KFC in Winnipeg's Osborne district and another in a storefront in a small mall in Billings, Montana were exceptional not only making our list of good restaurants, they are first and second of all Thai restaurants we have experienced from coast to coast.
We kept-up on the news - particularly the debate over health care. Canada's healthcare system is not perfect, but it is being misrepresented. We asked about our friends' experiences and no one had a horror-story - all were appreciative of the care they have received.
For example, in Manitoba, we spent time with a great family - a couple in their mid- thirties with a one year old girl. The father is still recovering from major brain surgery and before that radiation. In 2007 he was diagnosed with a small cell cancer. He almost immediately began radiation treatments at a specialty institution in Toronto, where he doesn't live. He and his family live in Winnipeg. Later he had surgery in Winnipeg and is now going through rehab there. His experience is in stark contrast to the experience claimed by the Ontario woman who had a non-malignant cyst near or perhaps on her optic nerve.
By the way, our friend (and relative) has been out of work for over a year because of the severity of the disease. His wife does work and he is now re-entering the workplace working part time for the company where he was working when he was diagnosed. The point is that the system in Canada provided for his treatment and recovery without bankrupting him and/or his family (his parents who would have helped financially if it had been necessary).
On the other side of the debate, Joan's mom had cataracts. She was not able to arrange to have surgery before her eyesight deteriorated to the point where, first, she didn't believe she saw well enough to drive and, second, she lost confidence that she could see traffic well enough to cross a busy street. We urged her to get the surgery as soon as possible, however there were not enough practitioners in Winnipeg and appointments were granted to the "worst first." The quality of her life deteriorated and even after surgery, she did not fully return.
Musings on the Road to Winnipeg - Happiness and Expectationstag:www.stanfordinn.com,2009:/blog//1.912009-08-04T23:06:34Z2009-08-05T00:30:30ZThe other day, on the way to Winnipeg to pick-up Kate, Joan and I talked about the nature of "happiness." We began by trying to define happiness. I remembered my work more than 30 years before and that for one...
doing. If what we are doing is something we want to do - and others would want us to do, then there's no problem. But when we think about what we are doing and believe we should be doing something else, there is dissonance and its partner unhappiness.
When we think about what we are doing, we can alter the nature of the experience by coming into conflict with it: the conflict arising between what we are doing and what we think we should be doing. The should arises from ideas we have regarding the importance and value of particular activities.
What blocks the experience of happiness is actually thought - thought in regard to assessing one's state. If I ask, is this job good enough for me, am I fulfilling myself, etc., how do I find the answer? I compare what I am doing with what I think I should be doing - based on what my expectations are for myself, or just as likely, what my parents expected, or Joan expects. These expectations are powerful. They are at the core of our identity - not who we really are, but who we think we should be, or our parents, educators, significant others think we should be.
And expectations prevent me from simply embracing my experience. Expectations block happiness. And the most paradoxical expectation is that I must always be happy!
However, expectations are helpful - guiding. We must be mindful of them - aware of their power, their driving force. And we must observe them, as they come to awareness - not judging, condemning, simply seeing them and learning as we do that in the very act of observing we free ourselves from their hold and "self" becomes more vibrant. And we become more spontaneous - acting without conditions, without expectation. It is in this action without condition that love arises. And with love happiness is moot.
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Gypsy at the Lake!tag:www.stanfordinn.com,2009:/blog//1.902009-08-04T04:14:40Z2009-08-04T04:16:54Z Gypsy and Joan, August 3, 2009, at Matlock, Manitoba. For those following Gypsy's story, here he is at the Lake not shown is his extended Manitoba family. He's a happy boy!...
Gypsy and Joan, August 3, 2009, at Matlock, Manitoba.
For those following Gypsy's story, here he is at the Lake not shown is his extended Manitoba family. He's a happy boy!]]>
A Question of Justice - Juvenile Justice Gone Awrytag:www.stanfordinn.com,2009:/blog//1.892009-08-04T03:03:02Z2009-08-04T04:12:43ZOur daughter forwarded us an editorial in The New York Times on juvenile justice in the United States "12 and in Prison" that notes that trying juveniles as adults is "terrible public policy." Children sentenced as adults are more likely...
The New York Times on juvenile justice in the United States "12 and in Prison" that notes that trying juveniles as adults is "terrible public policy." Children sentenced as adults are more likely to become repeat violent offenders and The New York Times calls for Congress to cause the States "to simply end these inhumane practices to be eligible for federal juvenile justice funds." The editorial could more simply advocate putting "justice" back into the nation's juvenile justice system.
This summer our daughter, a law student at New York University, interned in New Orleans helping represent children caught in the city's juvenile justice system. Some of the stories she tells are horrendous - there's a culture of violence in New Orleans that is difficult to understand and accept. Kids have access to guns; young teenagers steal cars, sell drugs, commit armed robberies, and worse. Police stop children without apparent cause. They use vehicles to knock kids off their bikes - bikes are often used as getaway vehicles. There are horrible stories and there are two sides. But what I got from her stories is that the kids do not expect justice and have an attitude that what they do doesn't matter because they will be hassled anyway and the police, in a similar mind-set, suspect that most children in certain areas are engaged in some criminal activity.
Kate believes in Justice with a capital "J" and she did not go to New Orleans with a mindset that the justice system is broken. She was however in the midst of it and I wasn't happy that she saw the underside of American Life. It sucks, to put it bluntly. It is sad that lives are lost either literally or figuratively.
In its op-ed, The New York Times sites a study by Michele Deitch of the LBJ School of Public Affairs at The University of Texas at Austin From Time Out to Hard Time - Young Children in the Adult Criminal Justice System. Deitch begins her study with the case of pre-teen Christopher Pittman who suffered from depression and was placed on Paxil. When his doctor ran out of the drug, the doctor gave a sample package of Zoloft. Immediately, relatives noticed a change in behavior. Trying to control the boy, his grandparents, threatened to paddle him. Later Christopher killed them in their sleep with a shotgun that had been a gift from his father and set fire to their house. The South Carolina juvenile justice system tried him as an adult. The case was complex due to the use of Zoloft and this child, who was 12 at the time of the murders and who had no history of delinquency, was sentenced to 30 years in jail with no chance of parole.
In South Carolina as in other states, fighting crime has become political with the result that our justice system is punitive and not reformative. And in many areas the juvenile justice system is nothing more than a juvenile control system.
How do we change all this? Kate knew of the inadequacies of our justice system and she chose to intern at Juvenile Regional Services in New Orleans, an overworked underfunded agency to help defend children caught in the system. In one of the cases she was assigned she was able to do the research, meet with the 14 year old client who was in jail, write arguments and working with the lead attorney, help prove the evidence to be insufficient and tainted. NYU paid her to do this work - about 1/10 the amount many interns receive in our corporate law firms. One case and there's many more. In the case of Christopher Pittman, the University of Texas study notes that "Christopher is believed to be serving the longest sentence in the country, if not the world, for a crime committed at such a young age."
The implications of recent research into the adolescent brain is striking. The American Bar Association's Juvenile Justice System reported inCruel and Unusual Punishment The Juvenile Death Penalty - Adolescence, Brain Development and Legal Culpability sites research by Elizabeth Sowell, UCLA, that frontal lobe is the last to develop and even though adolescents are fully capable in other areas, they cannot reason as well as adults. The brain continues to develop into the early 20's. The report notes that the frontal lobe governs judgment, impulsivity, future planning, "foresight of consequences," that make people "morally capable" and notes further that "age 21 or 22 would be closer to the 'biological' age of maturity." (Dr. Ruben C. Gur, neuropsychologist and Director of the Brain Behavior Laboratory at the University of Pennsylvania quoted in "Cruel and Unusual Punishment..." )
You can help by supporting organizations such as the Juvenile Justice Project of Louisiana whose mission is "to transform the juvenile justice system into one that builds on the strengths of young people, families and communities in order to instill hope and to ensure children are given the greatest opportunities to grow and thrive."
Stay mindful with regard to justice - advocate for district attorneys and judges who themselves are advocates for juvenile justice, who believe in redemption and are willing to work for it. I am not advocating that we "go easy" - I believe that we must extend a hand that is both firm and fair. Minimally, I advocate for treating children whose minds are not developed as beings in need of our assistance.
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Happiness is where you aretag:www.stanfordinn.com,2009:/blog//1.882009-08-01T16:14:22Z2009-08-01T16:40:20ZWhere else can it be? In my last writing I noted the explosion of life in Manitoba - here's a field of canola: And here are Dana's gardens at the Stanford Inn - she planted wildflowers, where last was a...
Where else can it be?
In my last writing I noted the explosion of life in Manitoba - here's a field of canola:
And here are Dana's gardens at the Stanford Inn - she planted wildflowers, where last was a 4-H project - now in summer hiatus.
Nature in explosions of color is happiness. And nature is in continuous change - which is what I wrote about earlier in "The Weather". And embracing change, which is our very nature, is embracing our life and for the I Ching's "superior" man (or woman) leads to success/happiness. But the I Ching guidance is far stronger - embracing our lives is success. And sometimes one has to cross the great river to get to that realization - to that success. We are lucky. Here, in Matlock, the great river is the Red River and in Mendocino it is the Big River. So near and so meaningful.
I am on "vacation" and my ordinary days are broken by this interval which allows time to contemplate the nature of life and in particular the nature of my own life. Everything is "grist" for this mill of contemplation. And what I notice is that this process is identical to that 35 years ago in this very place.
I go away from home to come home. It doesn't have to be Matlock. It can be in a hotel in Scottsdale or Phoenix during a break with Alex to catch a few of the Giant's spring training games. Or, I don't have to leave at all - there is the mental space of the morning in our own bedroom in the Barn after Joan has gone down to feed Murphy - while Gypsy waits for me before getting-up.
These moments are precious and they are bracing, or embracing. And here is joy.
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Happiness is always somewhere else...tag:www.stanfordinn.com,2009:/blog//1.872009-07-31T19:47:40Z2009-07-31T20:22:47ZI am sitting in what my kids as teenagers characterized as a dumpy, stinky cottage. It's raining. The kitchen is warm and bright. The phone doesn't work and there's no internet and I am writing this blog in Word to...
We were just speaking at the "breakfast table" (almost like "real" folks from a black and white movie from the black and white period before we were born) that some close friends never seem happy. These friends always speak about what is missing in their lives, what they want and usually where they would rather be. And what they want is similar from person to person varying in time and intensity and order -
A sexual partner
A new sexual partner
A new country in which to live and love
A new job
A new home
More money
The return of a loved-on
The opportunity to farm, to ranch, to become a gentleperson farmer
Their own business
To love ("I've smoked (pot) so much that I don't think I can ever love her")
To be loved
in essence
To be where happiness is!
(There's a guy in a yellow rain suit raising himself at the end of boom to our telephone lines. Maybe we will soon have telephone and internet again!)
If I say anything to someone about their transparent unhappiness, I am deemed an authority on happiness and therefore know nothing about their unhappiness. We have the Inn; we have people working for us. We live in one of the most beautiful places in the world, and so on. It is interesting - the people about whom I am writing include some in Mendocino, with jobs and apparent job security, surrounded by people who care for and love them.
I can tell you that we didn't start with an inn, employees. We didn't even start at 3rd base, which is code for someone born into money and privilege, I recently learned. Certainly our parents did well, but they weren't privileged. They worked to get where they were. And as far as we know they worried little about their own happiness. Joan's dad was the son of immigrants to Canada and his father was very ill for an extended period and died when her dad was only 15 or 16 with three younger brothers to worry about. Joan's mom had deeper Canadian roots but there was no great prosperity - her dad was a hotel engineer, what we call the head of maintenance at the Inn. My dad immigrated to the United States leaving behind a country and family devastated by the Great Depression. Both of our fathers worked and neither complained about their work. Both of our moms kept their houses and were involved in their communities in volunteer work, in our schools, in social activities such as bridge clubs and in hauling their children from one activity to another.
I know that we worked without concern about whether or not we were happy. We had and have purpose - to live, work and express our spirituality in a single context. In a way our lives are an application of principles gleaned from my years in anthropology. But the last thing that I was concerned with was happiness. There was and is too much to learn, too much to do, too much to live. We wanted our kids to see us work with joy - I wanted work integrated in LIVING. We wanted to help people and providing opportunities for people to express themselves has been a blessing. We have had to deal with ill health of parents, animals, friends - and through all of it we did not dwell on what change would make us happier. It wasn't a focus of any of our thoughts or conversations.
The Chinese concept of "joy" - kuài lè - is a state characterized by inner peace and happiness through appreciating the gifts in our lives. Joy in action is simply embracing our lives. In Western parlance it is "counting one's blessings" - taking stock - and then moving on in life - in living.
I never spoke with my parents regarding "happiness." I didn't talk to them about whether or not they wanted to live in another country - they had been through the Great Depression and WWII and implicitly I understood that they would move within the USA but never leave it. I don't know whether they "loved their lives" but I do know that my mom sought out and enjoyed her friends and my father sought out spiritual teachers and enjoyed his practices.
Back to our unsatisfied friends: I suspect that they do not truly acknowledge and deep;ly appreciate what they already have - embrace it all - as in kuài lè - JOY! Until they do, perhaps they will never truly know what gifts they have and what a gift they are to others. Pining always for something else, for someone else, for some other experience, for some other place, they may never know where they are. They look at the emptiness at the top of the proverbial half full glass and fail to enjoy the water - the elixir of life - in the lower half.
Finally, both Alex and Kate, now in their twenties appreciate the values of cottage life on the western shores of Lake Winnipeg. There's family here and much more - nature is so incredible and present. There's not a square inch that is not a rock or road that doesn't have something growing from it. Manitoba is Joy.]]>
The Weather tag:www.stanfordinn.com,2009:/blog//1.862009-07-30T16:54:22Z2009-07-30T21:52:50Z Pier at Matlock at Dusk Matlock - It is cooler here this summer than any in recent memory. Unlike last summer, the mosquitoes aren't instantly dehydrated in the sun - too bad for us; good for them. There were...
Pier at Matlock at Dusk
Matlock - It is cooler here this summer than any in recent memory. Unlike last summer, the mosquitoes aren't instantly dehydrated in the sun - too bad for us; good for them. There were no mosquitoes this winter in Mendocino. But there was heat. Some afternoons the temperature in the Stanford Inn's gardens reached 80F or 27C, while the average high is 57F or 14C.
From 1998 to 2008, global average temperature actually dropped and David R. Easterling of NOAA's* National Climatic Data Center and Michael Wehner of the Computational Research Division at the DOE's** Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory warn that such anomalies to the pattern of global warming are just that, anomalies. Other writers claim that the decade long drop in average temperature is 'proof' that the model for global warming is incorrect.
Planetary weather is complex and I am not a climatologist. My perspective has little to do with arguments regarding changes in planetary climate. But thinking about the weather gets me thinking about the nature of change and perception. Perception is awareness of change and a function of consciousness. Consciousness is composed of two phenomenon - that which changes and that which is beyond change and ineffable and therefore far beyond the scope of this writing.
Change: I am aware that temperatures are not what I am used to - it was hot in Mendocino in the winter and cold in Matlock both in the winter and, now, the summer. The climate is changing. I am aware of these changes. If there was no change, I probably would not be aware of climate at all - it would be much like the CMB cosmic microwave background - just "there" - or "here" - wherever that is!
A "thing" related to another "thing" - 80F today, while yesterday it was 50F - this is the content in this movement in consciousness. Awareness of changing averages can become contemplative - and emerges into another experience: Going deeply into this change - into the perception itself, of the comparison allowing me to "know" that today is hotter than yesterday is contemplation. And when I am contemplating the weather, where am I?
Am I here, now, experiencing the warmth, birds chirping, lawnmower humming across the road; the smells of freshly mowed grass and the mustiness of an old cottage? When I am truly listening, smelling, seeing, I no longer know that it is hotter today than yesterday. I don't even know "today" which can only exist in contrast to another day.
Lost in thought, in contemplation, experience is just as lost in the moment as it is when in the I am lost in the senses. But there's a difference. In the latter emerges a sense of something beyond myself. A presence of what some have called the beloved and others, spirit.
Reflecting on this, now, while no longer present in the smell of cut grass, the experience becomes classified and perhaps calcified. But the memory is that the moment was perfect - the robin chirping in the grass, the variety of greens dominating my sight, all of it. And our sense, moving out of this reflection, is to preserve it, to not harm it. And it is the moments of awareness that inform how we eat, the decisions we make regarding the products we use. These decisions are guided by a desire to not harm the beauty of this place, this planet.
Knowing that yesterday was cooler does not have the same power - it is not evocative. There are interpretations and experts and we get lost in the data and debates over their meanings. But there's no debate from the experience of mowed grass, robins chirping.... Try it.
Joan and Jeff
*National Oceanographic and Atmospheric Administration
**Department of Energy
]]>
February 6th, Saturday night, on my way to bed, I passed Murphy, our lab-cross, in the hallway. I climbed the first flight of stairs to our bedroom and in the near darkness, a dog flew passed me. Rounding the winding staircase, I looked up and watched as a white tail wagged in front of the bedroom door. I was totally confused. Murphy doesn't have a white tail. I looked down the stairs and looked back-up - no tail, no dog.
I called Murphy; heard her coming behind me. I stopped, stunned.
The first dog up the stairs? Gypsy!
He had died the night before. Months ago, when he was able-bodied, he would run ahead and wait at the door to go to bed. He hadn't been up-stairs since early October.
That first February week began auspiciously. For the first time in several months, Gypsy was nearly able to get up on his own. He begged for treats and played with his toys. That was Monday. But quickly he grew weak and by Friday, he was failing and after four months of near immobility due to arthritis his heart gave-up. He died as I was petting him.
I didn't know how to announce his passing. He is already missed by our friends and staff and by guests returning to the inn.
]]>
Gypsy and Joan, August 3, 2009, at Matlock, Manitoba.
For those following Gypsy's story, here he is at the Lake not shown is his extended Manitoba family. He's a happy boy!]]>
We were just speaking at the "breakfast table" (almost like "real" folks from a black and white movie from the black and white period before we were born) that some close friends never seem happy. These friends always speak about what is missing in their lives, what they want and usually where they would rather be. And what they want is similar from person to person varying in time and intensity and order -
A sexual partner
A new sexual partner
A new country in which to live and love
A new job
A new home
More money
The return of a loved-on
The opportunity to farm, to ranch, to become a gentleperson farmer
Their own business
To love ("I've smoked (pot) so much that I don't think I can ever love her")
To be loved
in essence
To be where happiness is!
(There's a guy in a yellow rain suit raising himself at the end of boom to our telephone lines. Maybe we will soon have telephone and internet again!)
If I say anything to someone about their transparent unhappiness, I am deemed an authority on happiness and therefore know nothing about their unhappiness. We have the Inn; we have people working for us. We live in one of the most beautiful places in the world, and so on. It is interesting - the people about whom I am writing include some in Mendocino, with jobs and apparent job security, surrounded by people who care for and love them.
I can tell you that we didn't start with an inn, employees. We didn't even start at 3rd base, which is code for someone born into money and privilege, I recently learned. Certainly our parents did well, but they weren't privileged. They worked to get where they were. And as far as we know they worried little about their own happiness. Joan's dad was the son of immigrants to Canada and his father was very ill for an extended period and died when her dad was only 15 or 16 with three younger brothers to worry about. Joan's mom had deeper Canadian roots but there was no great prosperity - her dad was a hotel engineer, what we call the head of maintenance at the Inn. My dad immigrated to the United States leaving behind a country and family devastated by the Great Depression. Both of our fathers worked and neither complained about their work. Both of our moms kept their houses and were involved in their communities in volunteer work, in our schools, in social activities such as bridge clubs and in hauling their children from one activity to another.
I know that we worked without concern about whether or not we were happy. We had and have purpose - to live, work and express our spirituality in a single context. In a way our lives are an application of principles gleaned from my years in anthropology. But the last thing that I was concerned with was happiness. There was and is too much to learn, too much to do, too much to live. We wanted our kids to see us work with joy - I wanted work integrated in LIVING. We wanted to help people and providing opportunities for people to express themselves has been a blessing. We have had to deal with ill health of parents, animals, friends - and through all of it we did not dwell on what change would make us happier. It wasn't a focus of any of our thoughts or conversations.
Pier at Matlock at Dusk
Matlock - It is cooler here this summer than any in recent memory. Unlike last summer, the mosquitoes aren't instantly dehydrated in the sun - too bad for us; good for them. There were no mosquitoes this winter in Mendocino. But there was heat. Some afternoons the temperature in the Stanford Inn's gardens reached 80F or 27C, while the average high is 57F or 14C.
From 1998 to 2008, global average temperature actually dropped and David R. Easterling of NOAA's* National Climatic Data Center and Michael Wehner of the Computational Research Division at the DOE's** Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory warn that such anomalies to the pattern of global warming are just that, anomalies. Other writers claim that the decade long drop in average temperature is 'proof' that the model for global warming is incorrect.
Planetary weather is complex and I am not a climatologist. My perspective has little to do with arguments regarding changes in planetary climate. But thinking about the weather gets me thinking about the nature of change and perception. Perception is awareness of change and a function of consciousness. Consciousness is composed of two phenomenon - that which changes and that which is beyond change and ineffable and therefore far beyond the scope of this writing.
Change: I am aware that temperatures are not what I am used to - it was hot in Mendocino in the winter and cold in Matlock both in the winter and, now, the summer. The climate is changing. I am aware of these changes. If there was no change, I probably would not be aware of climate at all - it would be much like the CMB cosmic microwave background - just "there" - or "here" - wherever that is!
A "thing" related to another "thing" - 80F today, while yesterday it was 50F - this is the content in this movement in consciousness. Awareness of changing averages can become contemplative - and emerges into another experience: Going deeply into this change - into the perception itself, of the comparison allowing me to "know" that today is hotter than yesterday is contemplation. And when I am contemplating the weather, where am I?
Am I here, now, experiencing the warmth, birds chirping, lawnmower humming across the road; the smells of freshly mowed grass and the mustiness of an old cottage? When I am truly listening, smelling, seeing, I no longer know that it is hotter today than yesterday. I don't even know "today" which can only exist in contrast to another day.
Lost in thought, in contemplation, experience is just as lost in the moment as it is when in the I am lost in the senses. But there's a difference. In the latter emerges a sense of something beyond myself. A presence of what some have called the beloved and others, spirit.
Reflecting on this, now, while no longer present in the smell of cut grass, the experience becomes classified and perhaps calcified. But the memory is that the moment was perfect - the robin chirping in the grass, the variety of greens dominating my sight, all of it. And our sense, moving out of this reflection, is to preserve it, to not harm it. And it is the moments of awareness that inform how we eat, the decisions we make regarding the products we use. These decisions are guided by a desire to not harm the beauty of this place, this planet.
Knowing that yesterday was cooler does not have the same power - it is not evocative. There are interpretations and experts and we get lost in the data and debates over their meanings. But there's no debate from the experience of mowed grass, robins chirping.... Try it.
Joan and Jeff
*National Oceanographic and Atmospheric Administration
**Department of Energy
]]>